Noise in the wires
Well, maybe not. I happen to be shut-in, but for the last few weeks i had to go out every few days to do things that aren't "buying food really fast with minimum communication or interaction with people".
I realize that for most people going outside is a part of daily activity, but to me any sort of prolonged exposure is frustrating as hell.
Worst thing about going outside is not people (not that I feel comfortable around humans, but i can manage), not wide open spaces, noises or anything else, but the fact that I end up alone being all alone with my thoughts.
Under normal conditions I can usually deal with the clusterfuck of thoughts in my head (or just distract myself with easily accessible books/movies/music), but outside my mind starts to eat itself pretty fast. Outside brings out worst kind of thoughts and requires a lot of pressure to keep myself from falling apart.
2-3 hours of the outer world drain me of energy for the rest of the day.


But right now It's deep night (early morning as i'm finishing this post), I'm drinking hot tea, preparing to watch a movie and feeling just fine. Life isn't all that bad to whine about it, really.
I've been watching a bunch of stuff lately, mostly asian stuff. China and Korea (and to a lesser extent - Japan) have that very delicious sort of hopelessness and fatalism in a lot of their movies that can rarely be found anywhere else. Sometimes they go a bit overboard with it though. It's sort of absurd to watch the entire cast of characters die in the final scene and the only survivor to go on a death row. I appreciate that you guys don't obsess about happy endings, but there is absolutely no reason to kill every single minor character just to make a statement. That's just cheap and exploitative.

Also, out of all the junk that I watched, I really enjoyed danish The Keeper of Lost Causes. It's maybe a bit cliche and traditional as far as detective stories go, but i still enjoyed it a lot. Sometimes simply being well made is enough to carry an otherwise standard concepts.
It sort of reminded me a lot about Fincher's version of Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, both with plot and cinematography, except i actually liked the characters this time (i can't think of a single non-terrible person in Fincher's movie).
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Writing things only in english is easier from a personal standpoint. I'm sort of worried about quality of my english though
I didn't even realize that 6 days have passed since last entry. Time flies, eh.